I made a deal with my body.
And my body broke it.
The son-of-a-bitch.
Last wednesday I worked this god-awful shift that started at 7am and went on and on and on (Like Celine Dion's heart) and eventually ended at 7pm. It was a long day full of poo-poo and crap and crud. So...You know just from those descriptive adjectives that the day was a stinker.
So when I got off work wednesday night I slept like a little baby. Aww.
I slept so well in fact, that I woke up yesterday morning at 12:45pm. And I deserved that sleep gosh-darnit. The problem was that I knew since I had slept roughly 12 hours, it would be harder than I am looking at fat girl porn to wake up the following morning at 6:30am for work.
You follow?
See, since I slept in so late...It would be impossible to catch some ZZzz's at a decent hour thereby making this mornings morning a real wham-binker of a poo-bah to get up for (I'm still loving my descriptive words on this Gag). So, yesterday morning I made a deal with my body.
I said: Look, body...You and me...We've been through a lot together, right buddy? You were there when I got my first pube...When I got my second pube. It was you and me buddy! Us against the world! So now I'm calling on a bit of a favor here. I need you to get to sleep tonight at a decent time, ok? Because if you don't...Tomorrow morning is going to be hell for both us, ok? So...Can you do this body? Can you try and sleep at a decent time? Please?
And the deal was made.
So along comes 8pm last night and guess what? Not tired. 9pm. Not tired. 10pm. Nope.
I get mad at my body.
My mind/voice gives my body one more shot. I say: Look, bro! Broski! The bro-minator! Bubby! You and me man. Spirit and guts! We've got to get some shut eye here! You know? Tomomrrow is going to be so brutal if we don't bro! So, please...let's sleep the sleep of a small baby lamb.
11pm. Not tired. 12am. Not tired. 1am. STILL NOT TIRED.
OKAY YOU BASTARD BODY YOU BROKE THE DAMN DEAL!
I eventually got to sleep at 3:45am to rapidly wake back up at 5:45am to get ready for work. Was waking up after 2ish hours of sleep rough? Did I in fact have a rough morning? Did my body fuck me over?
Yep.
Told you so, body.
F you.
-@